Team Spongebob rides again!

In which Fleche captain Paul Guttenburg herds his troops on a daring Easter Sunday fleche.

Fleche route
Route ridden, from ridewithgps.com

“Let’s go! We’ve got people to meet and food to eat”, says our Fleche captain, Paul Guttenburg as I am downing a scalding gulp of coffee at the San Rafael Safeway early Easter Sunday. 

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea 
"Spongebob squarepants"
Absorbant and yellow and porous is he 
"Spongebob Squarepants"


We are wet, cold, sleep deprived and hungry. We’ve just spent 23 hours together riding close to 240 miles as a team of five machines (three bikes and two tandems) with seven people. We need to be at Crepes on Cole in SF by 8:00AM to meet the dozens of other teams of crazy cyclists who have decided to spend Easter weekend out on the roads. 

We are riding the San Francisco Randonneurs Fleche. A fleche is a team ride, where 3 machines travel 360k (somewhere around 240 miles) together, riding a point-to-point course of their own making (fleche roughly translates to arrow). Self-support, no sags, 24 hour time limit. The general idea is to ride as a group, complete the distance, have fun, eat lots and not stay at any one checkpoint for longer than 2 hours. That last bit means that you can’t hammer the distance and then sleep for 5-6 hours and come in refreshed. Oh no, that would be too easy.

We are not alone in this endeavor. There are almost 20 teams out there. Folks riding from Yosemite Valley to Crepes on Cole, others from Sac, others from Salinas, others from the South Bay, zig-zagging their route to end up at Crepes on Cole. It’s an old randonneuring event birthed in France and is held each year on Easter weekend, globally.

Our gruppo for the event includes: Thrill Bill Larson, Phil Auriemma, and Tim Mason on single bikes and Sheri Pederson stoking with Paul Guttenberg and myself stoking with Willy Nevin. We have four Fleche virgins on this ride, who have no idea what they are in for, but everyone has a great attitude, which is the most important element for a successful ride. Super Mario joined us last year and he rides out with us for a bit.

We depart from Paul’s house in Davis at 8:00 and head to our first stop at 8:05 - the Nugget - for coffee and a roll. We see Will Isley there (2010 Tour de Fritter Grand Beignet) and hang until the coffee kicks in. Then we ride over Cardiac, to Moskowite Corners for a brief stop. Super Mario heads back to Davis and we push on to St. Helena and the Model Bakery. 

We have Spongebob masks on the back of our bikes and each bike is carrying a Spongebob beanie baby, which must make it to Crepes on Cole. Last year, we lost Spongebob, but he was safely transported to SF by a tandem team. Some Bobs are stuffed into backpacks or side pockets, Bills’ is pinned to the front of his handlebar bag, his legs dangling precariously above the front tire. We hear young children ask their parents why we have Spongebobs on our bikes and when we tell them where we are going and by when we need to get there – they shake their heads in wonder… or maybe they just think we are nuts, which is partially true. The children shy away.

We push north up the Silverado Trail to Calistoga, then to Geyserville, dropping into the lovely Alexander Valley. It’s a nice day, overcast and cool, but no rain and we are moving along enjoying the scenery and each other. Passing through Jimtown and on to Cloverdale, our most northern point, where we stop for lunch at the famous Hamburger Ranch.  We snarf baskets of French and sweet potato fries, gulping water and soda, regrouping for our ride to dinner in Guerneville.

The ride down through Dutcher Creek Rd, Yoakim Bridge and then Westside road is outstanding. Few cars, very cool wineries and interesting homes nestled up hillsides. About 5 miles out of Guernville it begins to drizzle. We drop down onto 116 and the River road and get to Guerneville for dinner at the Main Street Café.

The place is hopping with a live band and good smells (we are no longer in the good smell category). We chow, send out email messages letting people know we are OK and talk about the next section of the ride. The band recognizes Paul and they come over to say hello. After some coffee to pump us up for the night, we head out. 

Hoping for dry skies, we are met with a heavy drizzle, but we push on to the coast and turn left to ride south on highway 1. It is close to midnight, and the road is empty.  We take up the whole lane, our lights providing ample light, the surf pounding off the right. Stopping in Bodega Bay at a checkpoint (they are along the way to assure the organizers that we didn’t “cheat” on the route we were taking), people are, again, amazed at what we are doing.  

We are passed that now, the day is catching up to us and we are getting tired. Past Valley Ford, we head inland to Petyourlooma, the drizzle is now a full on rain. So, we ask, WWCND?

WWCND? What would Chuck Norris do? Guttenberg has a WWCND? app on his smartphone (not sure how smart that is, but…), and he has a whole host of new WWCND jokes in his arsenal. If you have ridden more than 10 minutes with Paul, then you know how this goes. He can and will unleash the jokes, and will keep em coming…  for hours….so he does, all the way to Petaluma. 

We pull over at a 7-11 (oh thank heaven), for more joe, and to warm up. Willy wants a laundromat – he is soaked through and skipped bringing his rain jacket. We still have 25 miles to go to our “rest/sleep stop”, and even if he dries his clothes, they will immediately get wet again. We push onto another 7-11 where a laundromat is located, but it is closed. Another fleche team is there, getting out of the rain and sipping coffee. While Willy decides what to do, another fleche team rides by.  Chuck Norris provides the answer. Willy buys a newspaper and proceeds to pad his front with it. The business section is on one thigh, sports on the other thigh, the front page on his torso. 

We push onto Marinwood. We get there by riding on Highway 101, which is sketchy, but cool because, 1). who rides their bikes on freeways?, 2) who does it at 2:00 in the the morning? The only plausible answer to these questions is, of course, Chuck Norris!

We reach our stop and go inside. We are at Paul’s brothers home. The basement has beds and quilts, coffee and bagels, a bathroom and access to the dryer! We peel off wet smelly clothes and dry them. We also sleep for an hour and a half. Up and out before 6:00, we go to the Safeway in San Rafael where we stop for our last checkpoint before heading into the city.

With three more steep hills to go, we drag ourselves through Marin to Sausolito. Finally reaching the edge of the bridge, we regroup so we can all ride over together. There is nothing like riding over the Golden Gate Bridge early in the morning, sans people and cars. It is quiet, except for the wind sweeping across the bay, and the clouds are low on the city. Spectacular. 

We wind through the Presideo wishing people a happy Easter, and finally, we are there, at Crepes on Cole. Bikes, 4 bikes deep, line the outside of the restaurant, and inside, there are our fellow fleche riders. Teams of smiling riders, all tiredness gone as calories are consumed and stories are swapped. We eat, we hang, we swap stories. We hoot and holler when new teams come in. We have a great time.

It is time to leave and so we ride out. WWCND? He would ride back to Davis via the Berkeley hills. We, however, are taking the train. It doesn’t take too long, and by 1:00 PM we are back at Casa Guttenberg’s where we started. It is sunny, we are smelly and very happy. 

Here’s our route if you are interested. If you have the inclination, here’s a link to info about fleche’s. I can guarantee a great adventure.  Thanks for reading.  

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